rANdOm

Some people have said they quite liked my "Fat Bottomed Owls", so I thought I might share more of my penmanship. I wrote quite a bit during a period of time in '99-2000 but instead of pointing you to my "still there but inactive" website, I'll just republish some of the things here. Sometimes funny, sometimes sad or thought provoking; or, like this next case, just purely random.
I always said on my website that if anyone could explain this fully, they'd win a prize. The offer still stands.

rANdOm

If it takes me all the road
I know my sense will win the race
And while in water walking red
I'll pass along the jolly sailor's tune

But choosing cheese can mortify the soul
And darkened summers twitter not
And keeping quiet little balls of sweat
Can't catch the loyal kingfisher

Ignoring now the bending trees,
I go alone into the fiery snow
And preconceptions welcome she
Who tells the world the gum is shiny.

With open door and creaking frog
He brings us gifts of pestilence
Though cheery sweet is not the past
Small children kill the laughter smells

And fancy Chemistry with blackness
Talks to rendered alien bogs
And switching over onto shadows
Chases down the walking blind

My partnership has frozen days
Who dance upon angelic light
And loneliness will lead
To lucky friendships with a greener glass

Copyright 1999 Wet Kipper Music

Fat Bottomed Owls

I'm a great fan of musical commedy. I am always impressed by people who can say something funny and set it to music, or parody someone else's songs and make it funny. So people like Bill Bailey, Billy Connelly (early stuff) and Wierd Al are favourites of mine.

for example, here's Wierd Al parodying James Blunt.

I'm quite fond of messing round with songs to be funny. When the choir went on Tour to South Africa in 2001, a friend and I made up new lyrics for some of the songs we sang, for example highlighting the fact that it was always the same person we waited for wherever we went, or singing the praises of Steve the Techy Guy.

Recently, the choir has been singing the Monkees' song "I'm a believer", but more in the style of the end of Shrek. The musical director said that although it's not a "Christian song", it certaily can be appreciated in a Christian way. He then challenged us to come up with a secular song which couldn;t really be thought of as "Christian".
"Fat Bottomed-Girls" was one reply, to which he said:
"you could change it to owls, and make it about the Ark. You know, something like

Fat Bottomed Owls you make the Rocking Ark go round"

so I went away and had a think, and came up with this (copyright me, 2006)

Fat Bottomed Owls.

“Ohhhh won’t you get on board that boat
Ohhhh when the flood comes we’ll all float
Ohhhh spread the word to every one”
Fat Bottomed Owls you make the rockin’ Ark go round
Fat Bottomed Owls you make the rockin’ Ark go round

I was just a Billy goat, not the kind of guy to gloat
but I’m part of an amazing menagerie
On the Ark with good old Noah, we had nowhere else to go-ah
When those waters rose we floated out to sea

I was grazing with my flock, and we all got quite a shock
When those rains came down we didn’t know what to do
Well those owls flew overhead, and told us what the Lord had said
“Go see Noah, and get on board tu-whoo-by-tu-whoo”

“Ohhhh won’t you get on board that boat
Ohhhh when the flood comes we’ll all float
Ohhhh spread the word to every one”
Fat Bottomed Owls you make the rockin’ Ark go round
Fat Bottomed Owls you make the rockin’ Ark go round

Well we’ve got Lions, geese and Dogs
We’ve got elephants and frogs,
And there’s rules here against eating your shipmates
For we know we’ll all be saved if we all stay well behaved
And when the water’s gone we’ll go and repopulate..

“Ohhhh won’t you get on board that boat
Ohhhh when the flood comes we’ll all float
Ohhhh spread the word to every one”
Fat Bottomed Owls you make the rockin’ Ark go round
Fat Bottomed Owls you make the rockin’ Ark go round

Spread out your wings and fly….

Come on Scotland !

Guess where I'll be on the next 2 coming saturdays ?


Yep, I've got tickets for the Scotland games against the Pacific Islanders (18th) and Australia (25th).
Sadly my view for those games will be nothing like what you see here. That was taken 10 days ago when our work went to watch the Edinburgh-Cardiff game in the hospitality suites.
Sadly the evening was spoiled by Cardiff getting 2 tries in the last ten minutes to take away Edinburgh's lead.
Here's hoping for a better result the next time I visit.

Back Home

Well, back at home, and back to work.
Our week away was very enjoyable we saw round York, and Ripon, and also managed to catch up with some friends who work down there.

this weekend we had a bit of a breakthrough and attacked our "Boxroom" - the room that still had unpacked boxes from our move (and some my parents "donated" from their house shortly afterwards). 3 Bin-bags for chucking and a box for the charity shop later, we were left with 1 box of stuff-to-be-kept-but-doesn't-have-a-home, and a big enough space for the desk we recently bought.
All that remains is for us to file away about 5 months worth of bank/utility/mobile bills and statements, and K has promised to re-order her craft boxes too. Who knows, the room might just be ready for K's sister to sleep there when she comes up at Christmas.

On tour

we're spending this weekend at my inlaws, then we've rented a cottage just North of York for a few days.

We're looking forward to spending some time "getting away from it all"